Before.....

These are my before pictures. I have lost 10 pounds since these were taken. I figure if I am going to blog about my weight loss I should be 100% open and honest which includes what I look like. I have nothing to hide when it comes to getting healthy and overcoming things that I have been through. These pictures are hard for me to look at because they show how far I let myself get back to my old ways but they are also what has motivated me to get on track. In a month I am going to take some more pictures of my progress. Hopefully I will be able to see a big difference. =)

When it all becomes clear

I have been a little upset for a few days over things not always working out for one reason or another at different non-profit organizations that I have volunteered at. This morning I came across a March of Dimes walk that will be held on my birthday. How awesome it will be to walk on my bday in Emma's name to help other babies? I really feel that I was meant for this. It is the perfect scenario. I get to help other babies on my birthday in Emma's name. I feel so blessed that the Lord put that walk in front of me. It makes me feel so much better about things. I am most def a doer and physically doing something to help ease my pain over her lose is going to go a long way toward my healing. I will be healing and I will be helping babies. Words cannot describe how happy this makes me. I feel driven again.

Slow and steady

I am down 10 pounds! I am so excited. They say the first step is the hardest but I think the first 10 pounds are the hardest. Losing the first 10 is the foundation and it takes longer to build a good foundation than the whole entire house. And without a strong foundation the house will crumble and so will any weight loss success. Of all of the times I have lost weight all I could see was the big picture. I overlooked the here and now. The foundation I laid was weak and crumbled because I worried more about losing fast at any cost. My new way of thinking is that if I lose 1 pound a week by the end of this year I will be 52 pounds lighter. Not bad if I say so myself. I don't have to lose 52 pounds in 6 months to be happy. Having a healthy mindset is making all of the difference in the world to me. O have I mentioned how much I dislike planks?

Interesting article

Please know that Calorie Count cannot and will not support you eating less than 1200 calories a day. We consider this unhealthy and CC is all about HEALTHY weight loss or weight maintenance.
From Mary Hartley, Calorie Count's Director of Nutrition: "By eating only 800 calories, you will not get enough energy, protein, fiber, vitamins, minerals and other components of food. In time, you could become malnourished, which can cause severe health risks such as respiratory infections, kidney failure, blindness, heart attack and even death."
Here is a brief reason why never less than 1200 from the Advice section of Calorie Count Plus, under the Q&A tab:
Why must I eat at least 1,200 calories a day when I want to eat less?
In order to get the daily food servings you need for a balanced diet, it takes about 1200 calories a day. With careful planning, you could have a balanced diet on 1000 calories, but the restrictiveness of a very low calorie level can lead to binging and weight cycling, which will take you further from your weight loss goal. What's more, very low calorie diets can cause excessive muscle breakdown and metabolic adaptations, which can drive down your calorie requirements. In the end, you'll need fewer calories to maintain a higher weight
Your body needs at least 1200 calories per day to survive.
Here is a very rough scientific break down provided by a dietitian for a 5' 2", 19 year old female weighing approximately 100 pounds, sitting around all day and doing nothing:

-The heart needs 12% of the calories (144 cals)
-The kidney needs 12% of the calories (144 cals)
-The Liver needs 23% of the calories (276 cals)
-The brain needs 23% of the calories (276 cals)
-The skeletal muscle needs 30% of the calories (360 cals)
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I have been guilty of  going on a really low calorie diet.  After a few weeks of it I was 10 pounds lighter and miserable. There is no way to be healthy on such a low calorie diet unless you are the size and weight of the example in the article. I want to lose weight to be healthy so I know that my body needs the proper nourishment in order to be healthy. I look back on what all I have put my body through and I am shocked that it is still functioning normally. Live and learn!

Kitten heels and pink polish

So yesterday when I was getting ready for church I decided to wear some heels. I haven't worn heels in several years. I wore the heels yesterday not because I was rewarding myself for losing weight like I have in the past. I wore them simply because I wanted to. I have to admit they made me feel spunky. Very spunky. So did the hot pink nail polish I had on. Sounds weird that just two little things can make a woman feel sexier but I find it to be very true. I think too often women don't do little things for themselves to feel good. We spend so much time taking care of others and trying to be Super Woman that we often overlook our own selves. We push aside things that make us feel good until the point that we become miserable and down on ourselves. For the past 6 months that's exactly where I have been. Miserable and down. But something about those kitten heels and the pink polish has given me a little boost. I feel at least a few layers of misery being pushed back and a litle more of me coming forward. I know that getting over the past 6 months is not going to be an easy task but I know I will triumph over the sadness that I have endured. I also know I will come out stronger than before.

Small things add up

I am doing this routine every morning when I wake up and right before I go to bed: 15 jumping jacks, 2 pushups, 10 crunches, 10 mountain climbers, and 10 sec plank. I am keeping the amount I do low so I don't get frustrated. Not sure how many calories I will burn and don't really care. Just wanting to gain my strength back. I have not had a Sprite today either. Just 5 more days until my splurge day. I feel great today!

Competition

 

I have signed up for a weight loss competition that is being done through a local news channel. I submitted my story and I am now waiting to see if I was picked or not. I am so excited. I am hoping this will give me back the motivation that I need. Fingers crossed! Even if I am not picked I still have challenged myself. I have a few things on my "Get Fit" challenge. First up: Add one second per day while planking. Yup I am going to attempt to plank....everyday! #2-No Sprite! That's it. Just two little changes this week. I will check back in mid-week to update on my progress.

One sided people= Boring people

One sided people annoy me. Yeah I said it and yes I let a certain type of person bother me. Maybe because in the past I have been one sided myself. Once I get into something I go at it 100% and push everything else aside. I let it become who I am and it defines me until the point I am exhausted and don't even recognize myself. Life is to short to just have one focus in life. Sure its good to get your workouts in, eat healthy, get good grades in school, volunteer at a non-profit, etc. But in my opinion a well rounded, strong person can fit all of those into life. The more versatile you are and the more active you are in ALL aspects of life the happier, healthier you are. Plus you come across as less annoying. I can only imagine how many times people would roll their eyes at me when I was going on and on about weight loss, working out or school work. It is hard but I try my best to not be so one sided anymore.

Healthy and wise

     I am in no way shape or form an expert on weight loss. But I can tell you a few things that do not work: laxatives, binge diets, fad diets, and laying on the couch. I have done them all. Sure some of the things I listed might work for awhile but in the end you will either wind up unhealthy or gain your weight back. I think the only true way to weight loss is through eating healthy and working out. And when I say eating healthy I don't mean starving yourself. I am totally in love with My Fitness Pal. It not only keeps me on track to not go over my calories it also keeps me on track to not go under. My weight loss is about being healthy and being under calories is just as detrimental to my health as being over. I also keep a count of my sodium intake and my fat intake. Having a high sodium and fat intake is in no way shape or form good for my heart. I have switched my focus to making sure ALL of my calories provide the correct amount of fat, sodium, carbs, etc. Binge eating my way through weight loss is also no longer an option for me. I used to be the world's worst about saving all of my calories to one meal a day. All that does is overload your system. Sure you might have weight loss results from doing this but shoot you can lose weight by smoking crack but it doesn't mean its healthy. Anywho! I have a busy day planned for today which includes hitting the gym even if its for a little while. I am not in a competition with others just myself. If the chick on the treadmill next to me is running 100 mph and has ran 10 miles I care not. All I care about is beating my own record. She will go home satisfied with her time and distance and so will I. Even if all I can do is 10 minutes. I still did 10 minutes.

Free your mind and the rest will follow

     Its been a few weeks since I have blogged and I sure have missed it. Blogging seems to be the best source of therapy for me. I have lost a few pounds since the last time I blogged. It seems like everytime I get to doing good with my weight loss something happens that takes me off of my path. Its my own fault. I shouldn't allow life to stop me from reaching my goals. I need to take all of the negative energy and use it when I run. Life didn't cause me to gain weight. I allowed it to happen. I didn't have to turn to food or the couch for comfort. I chose to do that. Heartaches come and go but you only have one body. Allowing myself to destroy my body then blame it on heartaches is not me. Even if I put 5 minutes a day into doing something for my health then I am on the right track. Its does take running a 5k everyday to be healthy. Little things can add up to major milestones. Somewhere deep inside of me I still have the inner strength and slowly but surely I am finding my way to it. A friend of mine gave me some great advice when I first started running. She said that when you are running and everytime your foot hits the ground you are stomping out negative things that go on in your life. She told me to imagine that the negative things are under my feet and that I am stomping the crap out of them with each step that I take. I have taken that advice a bit further. Everytime I reach my arm to stretch or push away dessert I visualize negative things floating away. Doing small thing to free my mind of the negative with result in my body following suit. You have to free your mind of garbage before you can truly become healthy.

Motivation

I have been doing all that I can to get motivated to go to the gym today. I finally talked myself into going and while I was there I had to talk myself into staying for the full 30 minutes. I did complete my 30 minutes and on the way out of the gym I saw one of my friends. She said that she had seen my truck sitting in front of them gym and that motivated her to go home, change her clothes, and come back to the gym. It made me feel great that even though I feel I have fallen so far down that I can still motivate someone. It motivated me so much that I have decided to start going to the gym at the same time on the same days every week so people will know they aren't alone and that they have someone to work out with.

Essence of True Sisterhood by Katrina LeShon

A true sister
Honors her sister
She praises her sister’s strong points
Whether its intelligence, beauty, or skills putting the right outfit together
She embraces her sister’s uniqueness
She stays in her own lane; she is not intimidated by her sister’s success
She doesn’t hate, she doesn’t cloak jealousy in her heart
She doesn’t mind seeing her sister go first
She doesn’t eclipse her time to shine
She doesn’t shoot down her aspirations or ideas
She doesn’t belittle or tear her down, to make self look good
She doesn’t gloat over her sister’s calamity
A true sister
Prays and intercedes with sincerity
She celebrates her sister; she wishes her the best
She supports, she encourages, she builds, and she edifies
A true sister
Respects her sister’s things, including her relationship
She doesn’t interfere; she doesn’t covet
She doesn’t overstep or cross boundaries
She covers, and protects; she loves at all times
She would never stand in the way of a blessing
Nor position herself as an enemy
A true sister in the Lord
Walks with integrity

July 19,2012

July 19,2012 is the last time I truly ran. I had to stop running because of the pain associated with gallbladder problems. I had surgery to remove me gallbladder on Oct.1 and it took me awhile to recover. A lot longer than I thought. 6 weeks after my surgery I lost my first grandchild which took an emotional toll on my already shaky psyche. In the past 5 months I have gained 25 pounds which puts me back to my highest total in weight. I swore I would never let this happen but life sometimes throws a monkey wrench in what we plan to do. I have also spent the last few months looking back on what was instead of living in the here and now. I have to slap my sports bra back on and get back on the gym floor! The past few months are behind me and I am going to live in the here and now. Onward & upward!

Onward & Upward: Good Works

James 2:18 - Yea, a man may say, Thou hast faith, and I have works: shew me thy faith without thy works, and I will shew thee my faith by my works.

One thing that is near and dear to my heart is doing for others. I have slacked off on that this past year but will not beat myself up over it. I have had my own trials and tribulations but have come to the realization if I had stayed on the path of doing for others then I might not have had such a hard time. I miss the feeling that I get from lending a helping hand and being good to someone in need. I know good works won't get me into Heaven but it sure makes my life better and much more happier.

Onward & Upward: Me

One of the main things that I want to working on in 2013 is giving myself a break. I think I am way too hard on myself, don't give myself the credit that I deserve, and don't do enough for myself. Fixing all of those "flaws" isn't going to be easy but I feel it will be worth it. Its been a rough year or two for me and I know its going to take some time along with mental training for me to get where I need to be. One of the biggest things I need to tackle is feeling guilty if I do something positive for myself i.e working out. The past few months have been a fog for me and I have slipped back into wanting to hide from the world. With help from God I am going to HAVE to push myself through this. I need to find the strength inside me that I feel has been buried for awhile now. I know its still there I just need to scrape away all of the guilt, insecurities, and fear to get to it. I have set forth some personal goals that I want to accomplish and without my inner strength and strength from God I won't ever be able to meet those personal goals.